When you’re pregnant with your first child, you—and others around you—encourage self-care. What does that mean? Well, when you have no kids, but are pregnant, it can mean getting a relaxing prenatal massage, a mani-pedi, some girl time with your besties, taking a long nap or diving into a good book. But when you’re a mom of one or two, self-care seems to get put on the back burner. You’re always running after a toddler or changing a diaper, helping with homework or driving to extracurriculars.
Sometimes it feels never ending, but so fulfilling at the same time.
When you’re a divorced single mom of two, self-care is a lot easier said than done. At least it was for me in the beginning. I spent my time without my kids yearning for their return because I missed them so much when they’re at their dad’s house. Truthfully, I still do. I miss them every time they’re away from me. It took a solid four-to-six months of adjusting to the custody schedule before I finally took a second to breathe.
As I’m sure I’ve said before, being a mom has always been a dream of mine and I’m lucky and grateful for my two littles. However, rediscovering myself after divorce has been really amazing. I put a part of myself on hold to house, birth and care for my two amazing children, and now that they’re older I get to unpause that part of myself, albeit slowly. And even though the stressors of life, navigating co-parenting, school runs and playdates take up a majority of my brainpower, when I don’t have to do focus on that for a night, or a weekend, I’m able to practice my own version of self-care.
For me, self-care is going to a pilates class or putting on a nice outfit and doing a full face of makeup to go out with my girls for a night. It’s also diving into a new book after doing my 4-step skincare routine and putting on my cozy robe. It’s nice to finally feel comfortable enough to give myself the attention I need when my kids aren’t with me (even though I wish they would be).
What does self-care look like for you? Leave a comment below.